An Unusual Position To Be In.

As I work for myself I obviously have a set number of clients who I visit on a daily, twice weekly or weekly basis. Over time I get to know the people I'm there to help as well as members of their family.  I know their daily routine, the people who come to visit, their past history and their future plans - often I see them more than their sons or daughters but that doesn't mean I am a 'replacement child' or should offer the opinions of one. This puts me in a sort of 'no man's land' - I'm neither stranger nor family. I am a friendly face that people are used to seeing and are familiar with yet not the sort of friend they'd spend a day with or go for dinner with. This, for me, is a trusted and honoured position to be in - I know intimate and personal details about many, am someone they feel they can trust and talk to and because of that I will bend over backwards to help them in any way I can.

Working so closely with people, at what is often a difficult time of their life, is a privilege, and it is something I feel very lucky to do. You see, medical professionals are always there to look at illnesses and poor health - seeing 'the patient' and working out how they can cure or alleviate problems. I, on the other hand, am there to help people be themselves and live with their difficulties as easily as possible - I don't judge or try to pretend it isn't tough and I hope that whilst I am there they get to be treated as the person they really are - as opposed to the patient or the dependant they often feel they are.

I always tell everyone that I won't ever lie to them (I may choose not to tell them something!) but if they ask me a question I will tell them the truth. So often people are worried about talking about a friend or family member dying - but put yourself in their shoes, they ARE dying and they'd really like to talk about it - don't we all like to discuss things we are trying to cope with? Enabling someone to talk about death or illness as well as the guilt they often feel about the extra strain they are putting on their family, allows them to off load the worries and thoughts that may otherwise drag them down into depression or anxiety. It's important that they know they can talk to someone who knows them but isn't directly related to them - and that, that someone won't disclose those thoughts with anyone else. Now THAT really is a position of trust and it's a position I feel honoured to be in.

Five years on...

FIVE years on and I can't believe I haven't checked in and updated this blog. Life just gets in the way sometimes. doesn't it? So much has changed - for the better I must add.

Back in 2013 I was keen and enthusiastic - and very, very naive! - my main concern being that I wouldn't be able to cope with some of the tasks required of me (namely the more medical or personal ones). How wrong I was! The job is the easy but. Working for a care company brings up many more challenges than whether you, yourself, are capable of doing it.

I love working in care but I can honestly say I have never felt as stressed as I became in the year or so I worked for a company. The pressure comes from the lack of time between calls, the number of calls needed within a short space of time, ensuring you arrive at a service user's home at a correct time because you are 'doubling up' with another carer (when you are already running late with your other calls), wanting to do the best job you can without the time to do it, the shortage of staff (which the office are always telling you is going to get better soon) - on top of which the office who are constantly calling to ask if you can 'just fit in Mr X' because someone else has gone off sick, broken down, is waiting for an ambulance etc. Add to that the pressure of a home life and a husband who would dearly like you to be a part of his life and the pressure becomes too much. After eighteen months with one company I had to leave - or lose my sanity. But, by then I had the experience, the confidence, the contacts, the knowledge of what I needed to do to help people with social workers etc. AND I knew I could do a great job so I had the foundations for starting out on my own.

There are so many different problems in the care system but I don't have the answer. I would love to set up the perfect company and ensure all clients of perfectly organised rotas, with fully caring staff who always turn up for work but I can't.

Instead, I have done the next best thing. I have set up as a self-employed carer under the company title of Your Home, My Help. I work from Monday to Friday, don't work nights or weekends (yes it really can be done) and only take on clients that I can safely and competently assist - sometimes I work with other private carers so we can cover for each other or fill in gaps that we can't fill. It's hard to say 'no' to anyone but unfortunately there are times when I can't fit someone in or their needs are too much for one carer on their own. I am now working at full capacity, with a waiting list and I absolutely love what I do.

I have established myself in our local, rural areas as a reliable and professional person who will travel to the remote places care companies struggle to reach; a problem I spotted when I worked for the company. Word of mouth is a wonderful thing and the best advert I could have - I never need to advertise and any gaps are quickly filled. District nurses and some of our GP's know me now too which really helps if I have a problem - it's also a great boost to my confidence when they listen to my opinion.

I came back to write this post in case any other aspiring carers were out there. I wanted to let them know that caring is a fantastic job. It's a rewarding job and one in which the clients you work with are always pleased to see you, need you and are grateful that you're there - what more can you want? I know some people find working for care companies OK but it didn't work for me, even though the actual job suited me really well. I'm enjoying what I set out to do five years ago, wouldn't change it for the world and have found a niche in which I can do a great job as well as fitting it in with the rest of my life. That's what it's all about, isn't it?

All in a Day's Work

For anyone who has ever wondered what it is a carer does I thought I'd share 'A Day in the Life of'.
Most people I know think it's either -
A - wiping people's bottoms all day, or
B - making cups of tea
Well they're all wrong!

Last Sunday for example I got to my first call at 6.30 to find a lady who had lost both hearing aids and was in desperate need of a wash and clean up. It took me an hour to realise that the hearing aids weren't going to materialise and then I hurtled off to the next stop - now late - having left a message for her daughter so she'd get something done for her.

Next stop - an elderly gent who needs a hand to get up in the morning. No problem on a normal day but on this particular occasion he'd decided to move his TV in the bedroom - and unplug it from the wall and the aerial ... Twenty minutes later I had the TV installed, batteries in the remote and porridge and tea set down in front of him.

And onward to the next stop where a fantastic lady waited patiently for me to give her her promised shower - it's not something she usually does on a Sunday morning but she'd asked me specifically if I'd 'be so kind'. In the back of my mind (SHAME ON ME!!) I had quietly hoped she might have forgotten but it really wasn't going to be my lucky day ... On leaving the shower I happened to notice a patch was missing from her arm - one often used for stroke sufferers. I replaced the absent disc, made breakfast, trying to make it look as if I wasn't rushing and headed out to my next stop.

Time wise I was slowly catching up - which was handy because I had to meet someone for a double call after my fifth call. The next stop is usually a quick chat and a cuppa but not that morning! The ceiling in the bathroom had turned itself into an indoor water feature and the light bulb was desperately close to being an underwater one :) A few phone calls later and I was back on the road.

So onward and upward I went to my next gentleman - only to find he wasn't there! He'd been taken ill in the night and his wife was desperately trying to find the matches to light the fire. Thankfully I found them on the kitchen table and we managed to get the fire going. Having made her some breakfast I made a few calls and got her in touch with the ward her husband was now on - and spoke to her neighbour who was only to pleased to go round and take her up to the hospital later.

I met up with my colleague at the next stop having just about caught up with myself. I moved from there to a blind gentleman who had been out the day before - on the say-so of his neighbour - despite the fact we had had four inches of snow the previous night. This particular man had been housebound for a week but the neighbour thought 'he'd be OK if he went slowly'! Unbelievable. Needless to say blind men with canes struggle to feel the difference between roads, pavements and kerbs in the snow and he only got as far as the end of the road before falling. Thankfully a passer by brought him home, no real harm done, but it makes me want to throttle that neighbour who only needed to stop and think for a second ...

Several more calls went without a hitch but my last one is worthy of a mention. This one was to an elderly lady who spends the day on her own. We go in to see all is well and help her get settled at night. I went in to a house that felt like a fridge at 8pm. The heating had packed up and she hadn't a clue what to do because her husband used to do that sort of thing. She'd been sat under a blanket all day because she "didn't want to make a fuss". Anyway with the heating back on full and heaters positioned around the house I got her into bed with the electric blanket on.

So that was a fairly typical day. Yes I made a few cups of tea - I wiped a few bottoms as well - but when you read it back both of those things have very little to do with my role as a carer. And you know what? Care is what I really really do.

One Month on ...

So I'm still at it - and loving every minute of it! One of the girls at work told me if I lasted the first month I'd be in it for life - how right she was!

The first week wasn't too bad but the second was stressful as I was out on my own. I hadn't given too much thought to fitness. My other jobs have always involved being physically fit but this one is exhausting mentally. It's not just the worry of being somewhere at the right time, it's remembering to sign forms, books and medicine charts. Sounds easy I know but try doing seven different people in the space of four hours (and driving from house to house) and you'll realise how easy it is to forget to sign your initials in one little box.

I've been very lucky. I'm working with some great people who have all helped me and looked out for my every mistake with patience and (more importantly!) understanding. Had they not been so kind I may well have lost all confidence in my ability to do this job. I'm my worst critic and so I don't need anyone to put me down when I make a mistake. It's encouraging to hear more experienced carers telling me they've all done similar things in the past.

Thankfully although my mistakes have been stupid they haven't been life threatening. I can learn from my mistakes and move on - as can the people I'm looking after. The amount of responsibility I have for people I now care for is immense. Seven weeks ago I was a groom. An experienced, confident one at that. Now here I am in charge of people whose actual life depends on whether I give them their medication in the right dosage at the right time. It's a huge change but one that I'm finding incredibly rewarding.

So am I looking back and laughing at my earlier mistakes? Well yes - as I knew I would. But more importantly I'm looking forward with a smile on my face at the prospect of a brilliant new career.
Watch this space!

Common Sense comes from Experience.

With training and shadowing out of the way I was unleashed on society last Wednesday! Thankfully the first day was more of the same - we do a lot of 'double up' calls that require two carers per person simply because you need an extra pair of hands. Moving someone - even using a hoist - from a bed to a wheelchair may sound easy enough but add to that a few catheter tubes or an arm or leg that refuses to go where its owner wants it to and you'll start to appreciate the need for two people.

The other plus side for me was the fact that that extra pair of hands knew exactly what we had to do! Whilst I'm happy to do what I'm told to do I'm very much in the dark about exactly how much of it should be done - and on what order.

People have told me it's all about common sense but I'm starting to realise you're not actually born with that - you learn from experience. I mean a toddler only learns that the fire is hot by touching it - right?

My first afternoon out on my own was a 'tea run'. Getting from house to house and doing what was required was challenging enough within the time but add to that a foot of snow and minus 5 temperatures (God bless you Mother Nature) and my stress level was fairly high! And that was before I met The Key Safe.

Now this is a classic case of common sense not being enough on its own. I opened the first without difficulty BUT when it came to locking it back up again I was at a loss as to how to do it. It was unlike the other three I've seen in my lifetime and try as I might I couldn't get the latch to drop and the box to shut! I phoned one of the others who tried her best to get me to understand. To cut a very long - and very cold - story short being the absolute hero that she was she came up and helped me do it 20 minutes later. By that stage I was late and freezing!

The next morning I was nervously on schedule until I arrived at one client's house to find her in bed feeling very unwell. Again common sense was needed but so was experience. I knew enough to phone a doctor and stay with her but after that I was at a complete loss. Did I give her her medication even though she was ill or did I leave her in bed and wait for the doctor to decide? Did I get someone else to continue my shift or get someone in to sit with her? OR did I just pat her on the hand and tell her The Doctor was coming? My mobile was red hot by the time I left her in the (more capable hands) of a neighbour and set out to complete my other six calls - all due before 11am.

So am I enjoying my new career? You bet I am! When it goes well it's one of the most rewarding jobs I've ever had the pleasure to do. When it goes wrong I remind myself that in a month's time I'm going to look back and laugh ... aren't I?!

In the Shadows

I'm away! So excited to finally have donned the uniform and got out there meeting the people I'm going to be helping. Technically speaking they are the 'service users' but they're all just lovely people.

So I had to 'shadow' another carer for 16 hours minimum so they can see that I'm OK interacting with people and am going to give a good standard of care. It may sound straight forward but believe me these are people's lives I'm playing with. One mistake may be more than stupid. I've asked to do a couple more days before I go it alone - just so I'm sure I know exactly where I have to be and what I have to do. You'd be amazed how much you have to cram into half an hour ( I struggle to get myself out of bed in that time let alone someone else!)

My main role is day to day care. That varies from person to person. Some need help to get dressed, go to the toilet, shower or make a cup of tea. Others just need checking up on once or twice a day - imagine if you had no family and you were the other side of 80? You'd want to know someone was out there wouldn't you?

Most people that ask me about this job are obsessed with toilet talk! Yes I have to deal with all that stuff but trust me when I tell you that it doesn't bother me in the slightest - nor does it bother anyone else in this job. Let's face it - if you were afraid of heights you would have a job tiling roofs would you?!

My one real surprise is how quickly people have accepted me. And just how quickly they've all become a part of my life. I went to bed last night wondering how a couple of them would be this morning - and thinking about how I could position a clock for another to make their life easier. You could say I'm absolutely hooked.

As jobs go I think I've chosen something else that's going to be a way of life not just a job. Right now that's a life I'm happy to have.

Not Long Now!

I've been waiting over four weeks for my Criminal Record thing to come back. Perhaps it got sent off late with everything else but isn't it always the way that I am the one in a million that went wrong in the system?!

Anyway work went online and submitted another one - and it came back within 24 hours. Why they don't do that in the first place I have no idea ...

So now I'm the (actually in all honestly) proud owner of a uniform, a few boxes of gloves and aprons, hand sanitiser and a clever little nurse's watch that clips on my collar and reads upside down. It's like playing Drs and Nurses when you were small (only I never did) only this is for real.

So many people are trying to put a downer on it I'm getting fed up of defending my decision. This is my life after all. Actually anyone with a negative opinion has never actually done the job so that's interesting...

Tomorrow I have three important writing commissions to finish - and a pony to muck out. And my dogs will no doubt want to go for a bit of a run (or swim) - and then I need to swat like a good little student so I remember what to do. There's stuff on dementia, diabetes, continence, care plans, lifting and handling, mobility, first aid - which is totally different to how it was back in 1980 by the way - lucky I haven't tried to do my version of CPR for a while! With so much to think about the big question is can I put it all into immediate practice? We'll know in 48 hours time. I'm off to go 'shadowing' with a senior carer - Jill. I'll bet she's dreading having to drag me out with her but I'm so looking forward to being able to see how things work.

My biggest worry is walking in to a complete stranger's home on my own with no idea what they expect me to do. I'm not that shy though so I'm sure this time next week I'll be buzzing. I'm thinking back to when I first taught a riding class lesson - aged 17. My boss just told me to remember that the class didn't know I hadn't done it before so to just get on with it. She was right of course and whenever I have a wobble it's what I'll hold onto.

Funny really how two jobs can be so different but bits of the training are relevant to both.